It's the most... Wonderful time.. Of 2013!

Yes I said it, it's the most wonderful time of 2013!! Why?? Well, let's make a list...

First: It's the beginning of the year! 

People get so motivated around this time.. All of their New Year's resolutions have been set and while I have hope that most of you will accomplish your goals, I know that 98% of you won't. 

My mom asked me New Year's Day what my resolution was and I said to get through 2013. I have decided not to set myself up for failure because let's face it, I say I want to lose weight but I know I'm not going too, I hate working out. Plus, I'll be having my 5th and FINAL (see how I put that in a caps?) baby in June and I can work with that whole, "I just had a baby" excuse at least until it's time to make my 2014 resolution. 

Then my mom says, "your resolution should be to talk nicer to people." Listen, if you know me, you know that I take after my grandma in a sense that I can be very sarcastic at times. I'm not trying to be mean, you just have to know ME and know that's how I talk. If you hear Josh and I talking to each other and I tell him I'm going to punch him, we're not fighting, that's just our language of love, I promise! If you hear me tell my kids (that aren't listening at the moment) that I'm going to wally womp them, they know that means that mama is about to get really upset and they should run, not that I'm literally going to wally womp them, unless they need it.. "Spare the rod, spoil the child." Sorry folks, I'm a firm believer in that one, get upset if you want but that's why I'm my kids mom and you're not! Another great example is if you've ever heard a conversation between my sister and I, although it may sound like we hate each other and loath the site of each other, it's really us telling each other how much we missed and love each other.. We get it, I guess I expect that you should too. 

Second: The Mayan's had it ALL WRONG!

While I didn't really believe that world was going to end on December 21st. you can't help but wonder. It didn't make it any better that all those stupid end of the world shows were on for like the whole month. I don't usually watch those shows but for some reason Josh LOVES them and thinks it's funny to scare me. I mean if you really think about it, the world is going to end at some point and I'm the type of person that I HATE not knowing. I want to know when things are going to happen so I can be prepared, you know like those doomsday prepper shows, so if NASA can help me out on this one I'd greatly appreciate it, thanks!

LAST: Reflecting on 2012...

Overall, when I look back at 2012 as a whole, it was a pretty dang good year. I was blessed with a job that I enjoy, never mind the pay, that's what school and a degree is for. My kids are healthy, my husband is happy, and my family is at peace. We went through some struggles as everyone does but with my amazing support system, we were able to pull through it and come out better than ever. Things could have always been worse but yet somehow we were able to stick together as a family and get through it. 2013 can only bring more joy, happiness, and prosperity. As Phil from Duck Dynasty would say, we are "happy, happy, happy!" 

Never Realized.....

Ok, it's been forever since I wrote in here..  I was all excited to blog for about 3 days and then I realized that doing this actually requires some amount of work and dedication... So as I'm sitting here with an empty office wondering why I'm not writing my paper due Sunday instead of this, I can't come up with a legit reason nor do I think I need one... I'll write my paper when I feel like it!! (I was stomping my feet and crossing my arms channeling Izabella if you couldn't already see it in your head..) 

Anywho.. Since my mind loooooves to wonder I was sitting there the other night thinking about all the things that I never realized or did and just didn't take the time to notice like...

I never realized how relaxed I am at night sitting outside staring at the stars... 

Josh and I do not get that much time together alone... Usually after we put the kids to bed we like to sit outside for 5-10 mins (or however long we can get without one of the kids getting up to find us,) and talk about our day or sometimes nothing at all.. I've realized though that that little amount of time we get can be a matter of going at each others throats or not. Listening to some Bob Marley at the same time isn't bad either... That guy was truly an inspiration of living a happy life... 

I never realized how much my kids truly love each other...

I mean obvi I know they love each other they're brother and sisters but watching them when they don't know you're watching them is such a gratifying thing... I see how Aiyden protects his "little piggy," as he calls Mila, and since Bell and Sarai go to school now, it's been him and her more and more and their bond is growing stronger because of it. They have their own language and can get lost in their little world without a care and I absolutely love it.. Sarai and Bella are becoming such young ladies too.. The conversations they have when they think we can't hear them is hilarious and I love peeking around the corner and seeing all 4 of them singing and dancing in their room like they rule the world... I can't wait to see what successful little human beings they're going to become..

I never realized what having "cousins" really meant until my kids and nieces..

My family is not a traditional one in the sense that I grew up around all my aunts, uncles, and cousins. When my grandma had my mom she was almost 50 so all my cousins are my mom's age pretty much.. My dad's side it was just him and his older sister.. She had 2 sons but we've never been close.. Our family is the type that we see each other twice a year for holiday's and 3 if someone dies.. Sad I know, but that's all I've ever known. I think with my dad it was different before my tata died.. I can remember BBQ's all the time with them but once he died I can't remember that happening anymore. Once my sister and I started having kids we SWORE that our family wouldn't be like that and so far it hasn't. I see my niece's all the time and we try and have family dinners at least once a week. Our kids are pretty close in age, my niece and son are 2 months apart and then my other niece and baby daughter are about 5 months apart. They're together all the time and call each other "best cousin friends." Being close as a family and my kids and my sister's kids knowing that we'll always be together is a good feeling inside. I can't wait for them to start school together.. My sister and I have already decided to take turns going to get them out of detention because their school has NO CLUE what they are getting themselves into!! LOL... Sorry in advance principle of our kids school!!

I never realized that true love REALLY existed until my parents and then grandparents...

Now days divorces are trending like it's the IT thing for Fall.. I realize that things happen that people can't get over and they can't physically or emotionally continue in a relationship with that person but I also think that people are so quick to throw in the towel. Back in the day divorce was unheard of or acceptable. My dad's parents got married young and stayed together until death did them part.. My mom's parents on the other hand were the old school Romeo and Juliet. My grandma got married and had my uncles and unfortunately the guy she was married too used to beat the hell out of her. If you ever met my grandma, you would know that she takes shyt from NO ONE, hence the divorce. So not only did my grandma get divorced but then she remarried my grandpa who was also not Mexican. (Back then that was a no no) So then my grandma gets disowned for a bit but she stayed with my grandpa who I think was the true lover of her life and they had my mama... She went through some shyt with him let's be clear about that, but she never gave up.. They loved each other more than anyone person could ever love.. My parents then met when my mom was a freshman in high school... They've been married now for 26 years but have been together over 30.. Again, my parents have had their share of drama and it was not pretty but at the end of the day, the love they have for each other is like the love their parents had for each other and because of that I don't ever see them parting.. Seeing how strong that love is makes me realize that mine is just as strong and only has the opportunity to get stronger. People like to give their opinions on my marriage all the time but at the end of the day for as young as we are... Our marriage so far is more successful than some who are older and have been married once, twice, divorced, or single.. SO HA! Lol... 

When you take the time to think about the things you never really realized.... It can open your mind to a whole different world... So realize all the things you never realized and see where you end up..

Motivation.....

Well, I was going to take a break from blogging today but then I got some motivation..

I'm a naturally curious person.. I always have been even if it doesn't seem like it.. If  I hear about something on the news I'm curious to know the why's and how's not so much the who, what, when, and where. I feel that if you think of things in a who, what, when, where fashion then your mind tends to form bias' in that matter. 

Take 9/11, now I'm using this as an example because it's the first thing that I thought of and it just passed so don't get your chonies in a bunch just yet.. When 9/11 happened people were so fixated on the who and what there was such a negative attention brought against the culture as a whole. I'm not saying everyone thinks or feels this way but I've seen my fair share of negativity towards the Middle East since 9/11. It's like everyone was so mad over what Bin Laden did, since they couldn't get to him, they took it out on everyone associated with that culture. Did we have a right to be mad?? DUH.. At the same time though the emotion needed to be placed in the correct direction. For the longest time and even now this is the conversation I have with some people regarding my cultural heratige: "Are you JUST Mexican because you look different? Well, no, I'm not JUST Mexican, I'm also Lebanese. What's Lebanese? Middle Eastern.. You mean like where Bin Laden's from? That would be the Middle East.. Oh, eww, ok.." Oh eww ok?? Really?? Are you that ignorant to place everyone that may have ties to that culture in the same melting pot? That's the type of answer that makes me want to punch someone in the face..

Ok, back to me being curious... So where I work, my Dr. is Muslim and one of the girls that volunteers here is also Muslim and I LOOOOVE learning about different cultures and religions because I like to see the different points of views people have. She sent me this message to motivate me to keep blogging and I think it's amazing... Read on.......

"...I would like to thank all of you for taking the time to follow along with my posts this past month. God-willing they were of some benefit to each of you; writing them were definitely of benefit to me, alhamdulillah and I'll definitely keep doing it for myself. I would recommend to all of you to keep a journal as well. It can be a very beneficial experience for a variety of reasons. You just have to be honest and open with your words. Don't write what you think you are supposed to write, but write what actually exists within you. It doesn't have to be seen by any eyes other than your own. It will also give you a means to look back at how far you have come, how you may have taken steps back, or perhaps haven't changed at all. It's helpful to see the way you speak to yourself, how you perceive the world and what kind of things are on your mind. A year from now, I can look back at these posts and see if the year in between brought any change to my life, or if I just stayed the same."

Amazing I know, and because of that message, that's exactly what I'm going to do and what my blogs are going to reflect. I'm going to take my curiosity and use it to open my mind and hopefully yours.. The world isn't just black and white.. There's a million in betweens and if you just take the time to see, those in betweens can be the most amazing, enlightening thing or person you've ever come across.

What the???

Day 2....

I must say, a lot of people have taken interest to my idea to blog.. The question on everybody's mind seems to be, "What are you going to blog about?" My answer? Whatever my mind thinks of that day! My mind is constantly going a million miles a minuet. I wake up thinking, I go to sleep thinking, I dream about what I fell asleep thinking about.. See my dilemma? I could say I'm going to blog about my kids and how nuts they can drive me but I know I'll stray and start talking about some sort of randomness like last night.....

So after a long day at work, Josh picks me up and we need to go to the store to finish getting dinner stuff since my husband is an AMAZING cook and loves making my tummy happy! He hates when I tell people that but I don't care.. I find it amazing that he can watch someone cooking something on TV, go to the store and get the stuff he thinks will taste good and then duplicate it for dinner... I on the other hand go to kitchen and always seem to think there's nothing to eat haha... He hates when I say that and then wanders into the kitchen and 30 minuets later.... SHABAM!! There's a 3 course meal sitting on the table.. Geez I'm blessed..

Anywho back to the story.. So we go to the store and of coarse having 4 kids, we only get a limited time per day to talk about our day, if we even have the energy to do so.. The other night we had one of those long married couple conversations about our likes and dislikes. You know, the one where I stayed up WAAAAY to late and didn't want to get up the next morning for work because of.. We've only been married 3 years, but we've been together 6 and have known each other since sophomore year so mind you, I know him better then he knows himself. I know what he wants before he knows what he wants.. He hates that but he's learned to live with it! See, I strayed again.. We talked about a lot in that conversation and one of the things we talked about is my dislike for the outdoors.. I can hear you guys laughing and I can see you shaking your heads. We went camping and stuff when I was a kid but I've never been a pee in the bush type of girl and plus, that whole thing with my mind, I'm always thinking about all the impossible things that could happen but probably won't. It's worse now that I have kids because naturally I want to kill anything that could have the potential to hurt them and bears is a pretty big thing on my list hahaha.. So after digesting everything that we talked about I realized that he was right.. Ok, kind of right, he'll never be 100% right :) So last night while he's grilling before I even realized what I was saying, organized a spur of the moment camping trip next weekend... WHAT THE?? Ok, so now I've said it and can't take it back.. I tell my parents and sister and they're laughing at me because they know how much I despise it but they agree to go.. What did I get myself into?? I think once we're there, and I find my mansion tent that I've requested my husband and dad to find, and I see my kids having a blast doing what they do best (getting dirty) I'll start to relax.. I hope.....

Oh and one other thing I found funny.. So as I finish telling my dad about camping he tells me, with this face:

"By the way, I just killed a wolf spider and I when I pulled back the towel, about 100 little babies scattered everywhere." WHAT THE?!?! So then I ask, "What happens if you get bit?" My dad's response? "Oh nothing your skin just starts to eat away at itself.. You have to get to the hospital pretty quick."

See... There goes my mind again, flesh eating spiders on the loose...

My 1st Attempt @ Blogging...

This is me.... Mrs. D...

Well, my real name as most of you know me is Julia... I came into this world as Julia Esquivias and if all goes well, I hope to leave this world as Julia Esquivias-Duarte... Why did I keep my maiden name? A lot of people ask me that because now my name is ridiculously long but I guess that goes with the whole traditional Mexican culture to have a million names that we're all expected to know how to pronounce.. Ok, I strayed back to my answer.. The reality of it is, my name represents the people that I love most. I don't think that getting married means that you HAVE to get rid of the name you've had your whole life.. What if your family has no boys to carry on the name?? Where does it go then?? I have a brother so I know the name will go on but I just felt like it was the right thing to do I guess..

I've never done this whole blogging thing so pardon my knowledge on this.. I'm sure I'll get the hang of it sooner or later.. I tend to say what's on my mind so I'm sorry in advance if you ever get offended but I think that's the point of a blog... It's mine and I don't care... Or am I wrong?? Well, whatever the answer is, I'm sure we'll find out soon enough.. TTFN...